I admit- I come home and go straight to the computer. I like to check my email. I like to check the news. And I really like to check facebook.
And without exception, my husband does not close the tabs and windows he was using when he gets done. He leaves them open all day, which means by the time I get home, there are 15 tabs and 3 windows open. Clutter. Ugh. I usually just X them out willy nilly. But the other day, something caught my eye.
Anders had clearly been preparing for the move to Georgia:
"Georgia Gun Laws in Plain English"
When asked why he was looking up Georgia gun laws, his response was, "Just in case."
I just walked away.
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Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Anders meets my dad...
This is an older story, but it needs to be told.
Anders and I had been dating for a while, so we decided it was time for him to meet my parents. With most couples, this entails some planning, mostly what they will have for dinner and what topics are off limits, etc etc. With Anders and me, we had to plan a way for him to get to Budapest from Sweden, then for us both to get to America. All flying on standby. Lufthansa had a strike this week, so there was no room for us on any Delta flight, so it took us a total of five days to get to America. We tried to leave from Budapest two days in a row and finally had to take a discount flight to Eindhoven, then a train from there to Amsterdam where we got stuck for three days. On the third day, we finally got on a flight and were winging our way across the Atlantic.
The stress of never knowing if you are going to get on the flight was combined with the fact that I hadn't seen my family in over six months and my boyfriend was meeting them for the first time. I was a hot mess by the time we took off. Now my mom wasn't going to be a problem. She knows how to behave herself. My dad on the other hand, has limited social skills and has no idea when to stop or when to filter his comments. No tact whatsoever. So for the three months before this visit, both my mom and I repeatedly told my dad to behave himself and gave him rules (ie, no racist jokes, no politics, etc etc) to follow. We also decided that under no circumstance would Anders and my dad be left alone together. Ever.
We landed in Atlanta, exhausted and relieved. We made it through customs and met my parents. I gave my parents really big hugs and introduced them to Anders. Now even though English is his second language, and we had just spent 5 very stressful days trying to get to Atlanta and had just spent 9 hours on a plane, Anders managed to be polite and sweet and warm. My dad responds with a racist joke about Barack Obama. Breaking the top two rules immediately. We're off to a good start.
But to give credit where credit is due, Dad did behave himself for the next three days. There were minimal awkward moments, which is always good. So when my mom ran an errand and left the three of us sitting around watching TV, I figured it was safe to leave them alone while I went to put away some laundry. I mean, they were sitting on opposite sides of the room and not talking. I thought everything would be fine.
WRONG.
I put away the laundry and came back to the living room. Which was now empty. The TV is still on, but no one is watching it. I went on a search- the office was empty, all three bedrooms were empty, the bathrooms were unoccupied and there was no one in the kitchen or dining room. While I am left wondering where in the world they could be, I hear a gunshot on the back porch.
Great. I'm pretty sure my dad has shot my boyfriend for his Socialist ways (my dad refers to socialism as the gateway drug to communism) and now there's a dead body on the porch, leaving me with an international incident to clean up. Thanks a lot Dad.
So I brace myself and open the door to the back porch. And there they are, taking turns shooting guns from my dad's arsenal, and drinking Bourbon.
I quietly close the door and let the bonding continue.
I asked Anders how it happened. I mean, I was gone for maybe 3 minutes before I came back and they were already gone! Apparently, the second I left the room, this is what happened:
Dad: Hey, do you like guns?
Anders: Well, I'm in the military, so yeah, sure.
Dad: Do you like whiskey?
Anders: Yeah
Dad: Well then, let's go.
Next thing Anders knows, Dad has already poured 3 fingers of Wild Turkey into some glasses and is on his way to the back porch with at least 3 guns under his arm.
Lesson: Things will happen, no matter how vigilant you are. And sometimes the things that happen are fantastic.
Anders and I had been dating for a while, so we decided it was time for him to meet my parents. With most couples, this entails some planning, mostly what they will have for dinner and what topics are off limits, etc etc. With Anders and me, we had to plan a way for him to get to Budapest from Sweden, then for us both to get to America. All flying on standby. Lufthansa had a strike this week, so there was no room for us on any Delta flight, so it took us a total of five days to get to America. We tried to leave from Budapest two days in a row and finally had to take a discount flight to Eindhoven, then a train from there to Amsterdam where we got stuck for three days. On the third day, we finally got on a flight and were winging our way across the Atlantic.
The stress of never knowing if you are going to get on the flight was combined with the fact that I hadn't seen my family in over six months and my boyfriend was meeting them for the first time. I was a hot mess by the time we took off. Now my mom wasn't going to be a problem. She knows how to behave herself. My dad on the other hand, has limited social skills and has no idea when to stop or when to filter his comments. No tact whatsoever. So for the three months before this visit, both my mom and I repeatedly told my dad to behave himself and gave him rules (ie, no racist jokes, no politics, etc etc) to follow. We also decided that under no circumstance would Anders and my dad be left alone together. Ever.
We landed in Atlanta, exhausted and relieved. We made it through customs and met my parents. I gave my parents really big hugs and introduced them to Anders. Now even though English is his second language, and we had just spent 5 very stressful days trying to get to Atlanta and had just spent 9 hours on a plane, Anders managed to be polite and sweet and warm. My dad responds with a racist joke about Barack Obama. Breaking the top two rules immediately. We're off to a good start.
But to give credit where credit is due, Dad did behave himself for the next three days. There were minimal awkward moments, which is always good. So when my mom ran an errand and left the three of us sitting around watching TV, I figured it was safe to leave them alone while I went to put away some laundry. I mean, they were sitting on opposite sides of the room and not talking. I thought everything would be fine.
WRONG.
I put away the laundry and came back to the living room. Which was now empty. The TV is still on, but no one is watching it. I went on a search- the office was empty, all three bedrooms were empty, the bathrooms were unoccupied and there was no one in the kitchen or dining room. While I am left wondering where in the world they could be, I hear a gunshot on the back porch.
Great. I'm pretty sure my dad has shot my boyfriend for his Socialist ways (my dad refers to socialism as the gateway drug to communism) and now there's a dead body on the porch, leaving me with an international incident to clean up. Thanks a lot Dad.
So I brace myself and open the door to the back porch. And there they are, taking turns shooting guns from my dad's arsenal, and drinking Bourbon.
I quietly close the door and let the bonding continue.
I asked Anders how it happened. I mean, I was gone for maybe 3 minutes before I came back and they were already gone! Apparently, the second I left the room, this is what happened:
Dad: Hey, do you like guns?
Anders: Well, I'm in the military, so yeah, sure.
Dad: Do you like whiskey?
Anders: Yeah
Dad: Well then, let's go.
Next thing Anders knows, Dad has already poured 3 fingers of Wild Turkey into some glasses and is on his way to the back porch with at least 3 guns under his arm.
Lesson: Things will happen, no matter how vigilant you are. And sometimes the things that happen are fantastic.
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